Monday, February 25, 2008

An Ode to Spring Training

Baseball season is finally here,
it's MLBDaddy's time to cheer.
Lets review and look ahead,
the creator of 'Smell Em' they call Red.

All the teams have opened up camp,
A boggy marsh is pretty damp.
Pitchers and catchers are getting in work,
Barry Bonds is still a jerk.

Lets take a look back at the off season,
there's been lots of changes for many reasons.
Torii gone, Santana too, BOO HOO(F)
Many pounds have been lost by Boof.

There was once a man who lived near Nantucket,
He took a big needle, in his butt he stuck it.
The steroids made him big and strong,
Now he's just another ding dong.

How embarrassing that must be for him,
Chances he will make the hall are slim.
I realize he didn't want to give up home runs,
but why put steroids in your buns?

Anyways, I'm sick of all that crap,
maple trees have sticky sap.
It's time to move on, am I not right?
Who the heck is pitching on opening night?

I'd have to say I'm pretty darn nervy,
Marisa Miller is nice and curvy.
The Twins pitching is young and unproven,
I use U-Haul for all my movin.

Who's playing center, second, and third?
Nick Punto is a frickin turd.
I'd like to see Mauer have a good year,
I'd also like a life time supply of beer.

Is anyone sold on Delmon Young,
or is he a pile of monkey dung?
I think that he'll be a crap addition,
lots of problems is my premonition.

The critics think the Twins will stink,
My cousin Robby dresses in pink.
I hope they are at least a decent squad,
For that I will stand and applaud.

It doesnt matter if they are good or not,
MLB's nose will be full of snot.
Together we will watch many a game,
I'll snuggle him and teach him all the players names.

I can't wait for the first pitch,
its like a scratch that needs an itch.
Yay yay yay, who needs another reason?
It's almost time for baseball season!!

4 comments:

Mel said...

I love, love, love, LOVE baseball...all sports!!! Can't wait to watch the Twin's kick some bootay this season, should be interesting!!!

jenny said...

'He took a big needle, in his butt he stuck it.'

You are a poet, that's for sure.

anne said...

I would like to see an entire post dedicated to that long-lost cousin Robbie of ours.

Carrie said...

Have fun in FL! My husband might end up in your bag without you knowing